Satsang of Initiator Susan Johnson

Wow! I just know that this body was made to have this experience. I don't think it was made for any other experience. And these eyes are just to see that glorious sight of Guru Maharaj Ji. These ears are just to hear Guru Maharaj Ji. These lips are just to kiss his Feet. This heart just beats for Guru Maharaj Ji.

Because really there's just no other experience in this world. There's just nothing else. This world is empty without this experience. This life is completely useless without Guru Maharaj Ji. It's such a divine experience. Guru Maharaj Ji is. Such a beautiful experience. So beautiful.

I just know that the purpose for this life is loving Guru Maharaj Ji, is feeling that love of Guru Maharaj Ji, being filled with that love of Guru Maharaj Ji. And every time I come to a program, every time I see Guru Maharaj Ji, I just never want to leave. I never want to go away.

And yet it just seems like he always sends us away. And it's kind of like those balloons that were sent off today at the beginning of the program. We just get spread out into this world. And it's almost like we're radioactive. We sort of leak this love. Guru Maharaj Ji just fills us up so much that it sort of comes out of us, everywhere. And little by little it spreads into this world.

And I know for myself, if it were up to me — because I'm so selfish — I would just always want to be with Guru Maharaj Ji. But he loves this world so much. He loves his children so much that he wants everyone to know how beautiful he is! And I'm so glad that he found me and picked me up. Somehow he catches me whenever I start to crawl away. And he's kept me. And I know he wants to keep all of us, all of the time. Because he knows how beautiful this life can be.

There's so many things that go on in this world. And yet around Guru Maharaj Ji, food loses its taste, friends lose their importance, sleep loses its effectiveness. Everything becomes irrelevant in the face of Guru Maharaj Ji. Every experience. And all I can do is just beg, "Guru Maharaj Ji, please never let me go. Please protect me. And help me to become more and more that true lover."

Because some people in this world, it just seems like they're lovers already. And some people he has to teach. And I feel like maybe I'm one of those people that he has to teach how to love, how to love him and how to appreciate him. And there's nothing else I want in this world. Nothing. And I know that's true for all of us. I know that's true for every one of us. Because I know that that's what this life was made for, to have that experience of experiences, which is Guru Maharaj Ji.

Guru Maharaj Ji, you're so beautiful — the way you move, the way you look, the way you talk, the way you are . . . you're so beautiful!

We were laughing in the van today on the way to the program about what Guru Maharaj Ji said yesterday, that this love was completely irrational. And we were laughing and saying, "Yes, it's completely irrational. Why should he love such a bunch of fools, such a bunch of hopeless cases!" And all I can do is say, "Thank you. Guru Maharaj Ji. Thank you so much! For having so much patience with me. I don't think your kindness has an end. I don't think your patience has an end. But I don't want to find it, I don't want to look for that end. Because I

know I haven't got much time in this life. I mean, no matter how long it is, it's too short. And so I don't want to waste my time. I just want to go faster. I want to do whatever I can do.

And sometimes I feel so slow, so painfully slow. And I don't want to be slow. I just want to be what you want me to be. I want to do whatever you want me to do. I just want to be however you want me to be. I want to be that puppet that just dances to your tune. It's such a beautiful tune you play. I don't want to be falling all over, stepping on your toes. I just want to spend this life loving you, dancing with you.

And I know there's nothing else, for every one of us. And maybe there's people here that don't understand that. This afternoon all of us were looking up at the press box. Three people there. Hovering. But you know, if you're one person looking at two people completely in love, of course you're going to feel left out. And maybe you'd feel like you shouldn't be seeing that. Some people feel that way. They feel embarassed. Or maybe you feel it's beautiful. Or maybe you feel you want some, too.

And Guru Maharaj Ji's just here in this world, just loving the most outrageous love. And nobody has to be left out. Nobody wants to be left out. And the only thing that's in our way is just our stupid ideas, just our ego. And all we have to do is just let go of those things and we can be in that love story. And to me that's what it's about.

I know for myself I just couldn't wait to get over here. I just came right over. Because I just wanted to be with Guru Maharaj Ji. And I just took all the steps that I could take to be with Guru Maharaj Ji as soon as possible. And I guess that's what a lot of you are doing too. Just coming to be with your lover.

The opportunity begins right now and goes on forever.

Pranam, Guru Maharaj Ji.